What Do You Think about Couple Therapy?
“What do you think about couple therapy? my Husband and I are struggling after the newborn stage and it feels like something broke in our relationship when we went through all that stress and strain, but I don’t want to give up. He doesn’t want to try, says it’s useless. But could it be helpful for us as new-ish parents and have a good impact on our 1 1/2 year old daughter by proxy?”
Becoming a parent is a major life transition and as such, it can strain a relationship. So, couples therapy may definitely be a good idea.
A therapist can help you work through whatever issues you are going through and as you rightly say, this may be good for your daughter as well. Children can be negatively impacted when their parents struggle. When parents are struggling, they are more likely to feel stressed, and stress in general does not go well with parenting.
Couples therapy usually involves weekly or biweekly sessions and may include ‘homework’ between sessions to continue working. In most cases, the couple meet with the therapist, but individual sessions are often also part of the process. A good therapist will tell you at the beginning what the planned length of therapy is. Typically, at least 12 sessions or so will be required. During sessions, the therapist acts as a mediator, allowing open communication and supporting both partners to share their emotions and thoughts respectfully and freely.
It is not uncommon for people to refuse to attend couple’s therapy or any type of therapy. Why? They may be worried about being blamed or judged, worried that it won’t work, worried that the therapist will take sides or about what others may think.
When is couple’s therapy a good idea? When there are:
- Communication issues
- Trust or infidelity concerns
- Sexual or intimacy difficulties
- Financial conflicts
- Parenting challenges
If your husband refuses to go to therapy, it may still be a good idea for you to attend alone. The therapist will give you insights to navigate your relationship challenges and to navigate your own challenges. Do not forget that becoming a mother is a massive change for any woman that should not be underestimated.
You may find these articles useful:
What Do I Do to Have my Partner Help Me More?
Staying Connected as a Couple When We Become Parents
How to Deal with the In-Laws: Th Good, Bad, and Ugly
I wish you all the best.
Ana
