Masterclass speaker
Parents' zone

Let’s be honest: who doesn’t ever yell at their kids?

About this class

Do you ever yell at your kids? Let’s be honest: Who doesn’t?? If you are one of those parents (I am with you), you may feel awful reading recent news headlines such as: ‘Adults shouting at children can be as harmful to a child’s development as sexual or physical abuse” (CNN);  ‘Shouting at children may be as damaging as physical or sexual abuse’ (The Guardian). These headlines are two examples of many articles that came out recently based on a new study considering verbal abuse a form of child abuse.

Let me be clear: I totally think that verbal abuse is a form of child abuse. But what I don’t agree with is with those headlines. In my opinion, this is an example of scientific research being misinterpreted and parenting advice missing important nuance, not only failing to help parents but provoking parental shame and guilt. What this study really found is that HOW we speak to our children matters. The tone of voice we use is important but WHAT we say is more important. There is a big difference between occasionally yelling at your child: “BRUSH YOUR TEETH, NOW!!!” and “YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING RIGHT!!!”. Not all yelling is equally negative. There is no scientific evidence supporting that occasional yelling is negative for children.

Am I advocating that it’s good to yell at our children? Not at all, it is clearly much better to talk to our children in a calm manner. But unless you have nerves of steel, it is almost impossible to raise a kid without at least yelling occasionally. So, let’s be realistic and instead of aiming to never yell, let’s try to do it as rarely as we can, and when we do it, not to say things that we will regret.

This live webinar was held in early 2024.

If you want to read more about this topic, you will also find this article useful.

About the expert

This webinar was held by REC Parenting founder and CEO, Dr Ana Aznar. Ana is a child psychologist, lecturer, researcher, author, and speaker. Born and raised in Madrid, Ana moved to London in her early 20s where she completed a BSc in Psychology (The Open University), an MSc in Applied Child Psychology, and a PhD in Developmental Psychology (Kingston University). Her main areas of research are parenting, family relations, and children’s socioemotional development. Her work has been published in different scientific journals as well as in the popular press and she has presented at national and international conferences.

Ana is passionate about supporting parents and children. She believes that by supporting parents, we will be helping to raise well-balanced, kind, and resilient children, who are the future of our society. This is why after experiencing first-hand how parents struggle to find support and reliable advice when they have issues or doubts, she founded REC Parenting, an online platform offering parents reliable, expert, and confident information. All in one place with no judgement and no agenda. She has four teenage boys.

Lessons in this class

1 Lessons (0:00min)
0. Lesson - The webinar 0:00

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